"You say that heaven can be won by battle. I cannot realise how heaven can be got through the killing of these revered Gurus. If this idea spreads, few Gurus can survive! Whatever you might say, let me tell you this: rather than earn happiness and power through these means, I feel it is better to live on alms collected from door to door. Food won through killing such men is mixed with their blood and I would prefer a meal got through beggary. Well, even if I give up all these qualms and fight, how can victory be counted upon? Expecting victory to come to us, how can I resolve to slaughter these elders and lose both worlds? If by chance they win, then beggary is inevitable, if we win, it is as bad as losing, for of what gain is victory, if the price we pay is the destruction of kith and kin? We gain but inconsolable grief for the rest of life. Krishna! I am at a loss to solve this problem. My intelligence has deserted me. My nature has undergone a vast change; I do not know why I cannot distinguish between right and wrong, Dharma and A-dharma."
"My Kshatriya blood rises up in protest when you prod it so; it is pushing me forward into battle. Fear of becoming the murderer of these revered elders is pulling me back. I am helpless. As you are guiding this chariot, guide me also and show me the way. Moreover, I am no more concerned with worldly prosperity; I crave for spiritual progress only," he said.
From that moment, Krishna became the Guru and Arjuna, the disciple. Arjuna prayed for that status and got it. Until Arjuna accepted that attitude of a learner, his heart was filled with egoism and weakness. The hero had become a zero. He had taken a position the very opposite of that taken up by Krishna.
The reason for all this, if you carefully study the situation, it is nothing but "egoism". Prema is the viewpoint of Krishna and Bhrama (delusion), of Arjuna. He suffered from agony because of that. Then he realised that egoism led only to further ignorance and confusion. He surrendered his judgement to the Lord and saved himself. He said he was but an instrument in the hands of the Lord. Recognising one's error is the first excellence of a good disciple; it is the beginning of wisdom. Only the foolish will feel they know all and suffer from the dire disease of a swollen head.
